Imagine my surprise when I opened the blog today to find you had re-released my letter! I felt an update was owed to the commentariat.
I can’t tell you how much I appreciated your advice on this peculiar situation. It was a much-needed grounding and reminder of what “normal” should look like. While I was not able to participate when the post was originally published, I did read every single comment!
Your point about questionable judgement was SPOT on.
“Scott” was indeed a younger employee and deeply convinced of the superiority of his own intellect and gender. He had a 5-, 10-, and 15-year life plan with ambitious goals. Unfortunately, this was coupled with no more sense than God gave a goose. His previous work experience in an unrelated field left him the impression that it was absolutely reasonable to deeply examine the people around him but then “verify” his findings through research.
As part of his 5-year plan, he was applying for many roles within the company in search of advancement, despite not having relevant experience nor demonstrating development in any key skill areas. As mentioned in my letter, I was hired on in a line-level position and then promoted to a management position within a couple of months. In that industry, career advancement is often tied to re-assignment in diverse geographic locations (going where the work is) and arriving at a new location is accompanied by sharing bona fides with the team to build connections. Imagine you’ve worked for 20 years for the same company, but have moved eight times and never worked in the same place/with the same team more than two years in a row. I had spent a great deal of time grabbing opportunities as they arose, living out of suitcases, and working far, far too much. I had garnered some nice accolades in some faintly glamorous locales, but anyone who has done it knows that the luster is surface-level only.
Scott was intensely interested in my career experience and how I progressed in the field. Coupled with his desire for promotion and deeply flawed perceptions around reasonable follow-up, this led to the rather extraordinary situation I wrote in about.
Armed with the knowledge that Scott was about as intuitive as a pile of bricks, I was planning a follow-up conversation the next time we worked together. He beat me to the punch when he asked me AGAIN about the information he had found as soon as I approached his desk. This time with a copy of my booking photo pulled up on his screen. (!!!!) I reacted much more decisively this time, telling him to close the browsing window immediately and pulling him into the office for a one-on-one conversation.
Looking back, I think I used your phrasing almost verbatim around work boundaries and everyone deserving privacy. Scott was mostly confused by this response. In his view, it was perfectly reasonable to look for deeper information about almost anyone. His rationale behind asking me about what he’d found was he “wanted to alert me this information was out there.” I told him it was unacceptable behavior and demonstrated incredibly poor judgement that he’d dig this far into any colleague, much less his manager. Then to bring it up multiple times! The company completed background checks for every employee. If they had proceeded with the hire, one would assume that nothing relevant was in the report! I also let him know this was such an egregious situation, we would be documenting both conversations and issuing a write-up, and this endangered his future with the company.
After distance from the situation, I genuinely believe Scott was an incredibly intelligent person demonstrating that anyone can be an absolute idiot.
Did I document the situation in detail? Absolutely.
Did I discuss this with HR and my boss? Absolutely and she was ready to fire Scott. HR was flabbergasted and incredibly helpful in their handling of the situation. My documentation plan was supported with the agreement that Scott was on his on his final chance.
Did Scott get promoted into another position? Not while I was there.
After this incident, he did demonstrate an earnest desire to improve as a team member and make amends. We parted on decent terms. I actually wound up suggesting he read AAM regularly!
Unfortunately, my industry was one devastated by the pandemic. I wrote the letter in mid-2019. By March of 2020, almost my entire professional network was either unemployed or being overworked as skeleton staff. Driven by necessity, I grabbed a copy of Alison’s book How To Get A Job and, after giving some serious consideration about what I’d like out of my work moving forward, I re-tooled my resume and got to hunting.
I’ve successfully transitioned to a new, very different industry and landed a position with a great company. It offers a much better work-life balance and more reasonable employee culture. While I do sometimes miss my old career, my situation is much improved and I have been quite happy to be settled down.
I have no idea where Scott has landed but I wish him well. I will NOT be googling him.