A reader writes:

I have a tricky situation involving prior sexual harassment/creepy behavior by a potential future coworker at a job I’m applying for.

A year ago, I matched with a man on a dating app who works in my (very small) field. The conversation was pleasant but we never met up and eventually lost touch. Months later, he added me on social media and messaged me, essentially saying he was masturbating to my photos. I blocked him. I also belong to one of the “Are we dating the same guy?” Facebook groups in my city and he was also posted there for saying extremely vulgar, demeaning things to women on dating apps. At least six women shared similar interactions with him (with screenshot evidence). Since then, he attempted following me from a different account, which I also blocked.

Through LinkedIn (we have mutual connections), I saw that he started a job at a company that’s doing a lot of innovative work in our field. I’ve always dreamed of working there eventually and a recruiter from that company just contacted me for an amazing role on the same team he works on. I don’t know what to do. I’m so icked out at the idea of working with this disgusting man. On the other hand, I hate that I’m letting this man stop me from going for a job I really want.

Is there any way I could report him for harassment and anonymously send the screenshots to their ethics hotline before even starting? Or if I turn down the job, could I share this information with them? Is creepy behavior to women outside of work even something companies can take action on? It all just feels unjust.

Ugh, I’m so sorry. It’s not right that you’re reluctant to go after a job you want because a creep works there.

Most companies won’t act on evidence that an employee is a disgusting jerk on dating apps. I’d argue that they should, and your situation is a prime example of why: it will affect who’s willing to work with them (and not just prospective employees, but prospective clients too) and it raises questions about his ability to deal with female colleagues respectfully and professionally. But still, most companies won’t consider it their business unless it shows up at work in some way.

However, if you’re offered the job and turn it down, you could certainly tell them why. They should be aware that employing this dirtbag is driving away good candidates (and it should make them question how he might be interacting with the women he works with as well).

You could also be up-front with the recruiter that you’d love to work for the company but you and other women have been harassed outside of work by one of their employees, and ask how closely the position they’re hiring for works with this guy.

Or, of course, you could go for the job, accept it if you want to, and after you’ve been there a while discreetly let other women know about the jagoff they’re working with.

I’m sorry there aren’t better solutions.